We all could probably stand to lighten up a little bit, and taking that big step into marriage is a perfect example. Planning a wedding is stressful, and who needs wedding-day jitters? Poking fun at traditions and throwing a little joke into your greetings will create a fun memory. Brighten the day with these funny wedding wishes and messages and let the happy couple know how glad you are for them by making them smile.
Funny wedding wishes & messages
- Friend, there are two things in this world that are not for sissies—getting married and getting older. Good luck with both!
- Be clear, and don’t mumble. Stand tall, and don’t crumble. Friend, in marriage you have to “Get ready to rumble!”
- There is no life-time guarantee or warranty on marriage. When things go wrong, be willing to fix what’s broken, my friend. You can’t trade him/her in.
- It’s time to close your mouth and open your eyes. Marriage is always a big surprise. Good luck adjusting, my friend.
- Friend, may the bonds of marriage not turn into prison bars. Happy married life!
- I never understood why people “fall” in love. It seems you should step in slowly so you can see what you’re getting into. Happy wedding day anyway, friend.
- Friend, I hear you’re taking the plunge. It will be a shock at first, but you’ll get used to it. Congratulations!
- Friend, you’ve gotten married; it’s sealed with a kiss. Now, don’t worry about the things you’ll miss. Like your sanity.
- Friend, you’re both a little fruity, but you make the perfect “pear.” Go bananas on your wedding day.
- Dear friend, life together will be gouda. Just brie. (Sorry for being cheesy.)
- I “herd” you got married! Alpaca my things and come visit. Happy marriage, friend.
- Friend, a honeymoon is the only time you leave on a cruise ship and come back on a battle ship.
- Here’s hoping the bluebirds of happiness don’t poop on your wedding, friend.
For Your Brother
- Hey, bro, there’s still time to run! Just kidding; she’s great!
- Congrats, brother! Maybe she’ll let you keep most of your toys.
- Bro, the best time to run is when everyone has their eyes closed during the prayer.
- She’ll steal your heart and then your name; things will never be the same. Don’t say you weren’t warned, brother.
- Kiss, kiss, bliss, bliss. She found her mister, you found your miss. Happy marrying!
- Brother, I think she bewitched you so she could hitch you.
- When you tie the knot, just be sure there’s a little wiggle room, bro.
- Remember to cherish, honor, and put the seat down when you’re done, brother.
- Congratulations on being awfully married, my brother! (I mean lawfully married!)
[Read also: Cute Wedding Wishes For Brother ]
- Don’t worry, bro; I won’t bring up anything during my toast that reminds you of all the stupid things you’ve done in the past.
- Don’t worry, bro. I’ll be standing right beside you when you say, “I do” just in case you need someone to hold you up and help you go through with it.
- Time for the wise brotherly advice you’ve grown to expect: be sure to smear wedding cake all over her face. Girls love that.
For Your Sister
- Sis, I’m officially handing over the job of most annoying person in your life to the groom. Congrats!
- Madly in love or just plain mad? Time will tell! Happy wedding day, sis.
- Happy, happy, joy, joy! Time to give up all the boys boys! Love you, sis!
- Sister, say it isn’t so! You can’t leave me all alone with our parents!
- Marry him quick, seal it with a kiss; just don’t let him get away, sweet sis!
- Don’t worry, sister. I filled him in on how marrying you means I’ll always be hanging around and calling because you are so good at solving my problems. We can’t have him thinking he’ll have you all to himself now.
- Sisters are like shoes: sometimes they rub you the wrong way, but they always make you look good. I promise to make you look amazing at your wedding.
- Sis, does he realize that being raised with a bunch of brothers means you know how to throw a punch or two? Maybe I should warn him.
[Read also: Sweet Wedding Wishes For Sister ]
- Sis, you talk all day, you snore all night. Let’s hope this will not cause a fight!
- Has he ever seen you without makeup, sis? If not, maybe I should warn him before he sees you without it.
- So my sister found a mister! Happy day!
For Your Son
- Son, best wishes on your wedding day. Your mother and I hope you like your new boss.
- The secret to a happy marriage . . . has yet to be revealed! Best of luck, son.
- Son, I just want you to know that veils were invented so that the groom can’t see all the scheming going on in the bride’s eyes.
- Marriage is like dancing: keep in step, stay off her toes, tell her she’s pretty, and hand her a rose. May the music never fade, son.
- Here comes the bride, with mama by her side. You’re in for a lifetime of never being right. Sorry, son.
- Here’s a toast to the happy couple from mom and dad! We loaf you both, and we’re glad you found someone who butters your bread.
For Your Daughter
- This mama don’t want no drama! Keep bridezilla to yourself.
- Daughter, here is some important information for you to remember on your wedding day: love may never expire, but it sure does perspire.
- Whether you marry for love or marry for money, get ready to be stuck a while, honey.
- To our little princess on your wedding day, make sure he knows how to polish your crown.
- Daughter, may the two of you stay in love forever. We’re spending too much on this wedding for it to only last a little while.
- Daughter, I hope he brings you as much joy as you have brought me. And a little of the exasperation, too, so you can see how that felt.