Although there a lot of ways to be a good spouse to your spouse, all marriages are not the same. What works for one couple, may not work for another couple. However, there are many tips that you can use to improve your marriage.
11 Tips For Improving Your Marriage
1. Don’t take your spouse for granted
If you do not give attention to your spouse and spend time with them because you think that they will always be there, you may find out one day that they are not. You need to take the time to be kind, thoughtful, appreciative, respectful, and affirming when it comes to how you treat your spouse.
Not taking your spouse for granted does not mean that you remember their birthday and your wedding anniversary. It means that you are tuned into what they feel and think. You really listen to them without interrupting. You show them your love for them as well telling them of your love for them.
2. Work together as a couple to make your sex life be great
There are married couples that do not have sex very often. If you do not want to be a part of that group, do not put you and your spouse’s sex life on the bottom of your list of priorities. Remind each other of the lust and desire that you had for each other at the start of your relationship. Leave romantic and suggestive notes for each other. Flirt with each other. Make time alone with your spouse on a regular basis.
If you have a television in your room, seriously think about removing it from your room and stop using your mobile phone before sleep. Showing your spouse how much you love and care for them typically helps marriages have a fulfilling and satisfying sex life.
3. Agree to do your part of the housework
If you want a calm, clean and well-organized home, then you and your spouse should work together as a couple to make sure that the household chores are divided equally between the two of them.
This is a lot more crucial if both of you work outside the home. Tasks like keeping a budget, home maintenance, yard work, shopping, planning, cooking, cleaning, caring for your children, transportation, etc., should be shared responsibilities. Having a cluttered and messy house can be stressful for both of you, so talk to each other about how to keep the clutter down in your home.
4. Discuss your finances
When you and your spouse have money, it can cause a rift between the two of you if you two have not talked about the goals that both of you have for your money, like spending money and saving money.
If you and your spouse are living on a tight budget, money can cause division and stress in your relationship. Attending a financial workshop might be a good idea for you and your spouse. Other ideas to help you and your spouse with your finances are: working with a person that has experience in managing money, learn ways of how to build a nest egg for unexpected events, and planning ahead for when you retire. Talk about money issues with your spouse so you can be on the same page when it comes to financial matters.
5. Make your lives easier
Consider how many hours you work at your job every week. You also need to think about how much time you spend volunteering, on the upkeep of your home, and how much time you want to spend with your family and friends. Then compare that to how much time that you spend with your spouse.
Is it way out of balance? If so, take a good look at how both you and your spouse spend your time and think about how to make your lives easier no matter what stage of life you are a newly married couple, in the child-rearing stage, or it is just the two of you in your home again.
If you work too much, are overextended, and are very exhausted, you are putting your marriage in jeopardy. You could think about downsizing your home. This includes more than moving into a smaller house. It is more about your attitude than the size of your home. Your marriage needs to be your top priority or your marriage will not last.
6. Be respectful
Be sure to thank your spouse for the hard work that they do every day. Trust the choices that they make. For example, do not be a backseat driver. Your spouse drove for many years before you got together.
If you criticize their driving skills, they will feel that you do not trust them and that they are not a good driver. You also need to talk very well about your spouse when you are outside of your home.
7. Watch what you say
Make your home a safe place where your spouse wants to be and where they can be themselves. Over time, they will feel comfortable sharing their insecurities with you. Never use their insecurities as something to hold over their head.
8. Put your spouse before your kids and work
This can be very hard to do, especially when your children are young and they need a lot from you. Wouldn’t you prefer for you and your spouse to approach parenting as a happy and strong unit? Wouldn’t you also like for you and your spouse to spend time together after your children are in bed?
One day your children will move out and it will be just you and your spouse. It is very important for your children to see you and your spouse make your marriage your top priority.
9. Focus on the positives
If you see a towel your spouse left behind after their shower or dirty clothes just thrown around, do not think that your love did this intentionally to upset you. Rather, think about all that they do.
-They work hard.
-They take care of the children.
-They make dinner a few times a week.
-They take out the trash.
Whatever they do, focus on the positives.
Turn the negatives around. For example, if they are a procrastinator, be happy that they are a laid back person. This does not mean that you should not bring up the towel that they left behind after their shower, just be cautious of how often you mention it and watch the tone that you use when you mention it to them.
10. Say “I love you”
Love is a choice, a decision, and a commitment. You are not going to fall head-over-heels in love with your spouse every day. You will do this by telling each other that you love each other on a daily basis and reminding each other that love is a conscious choice that you are making. Write it on the bathroom mirror, text it to your spouse, or even put it on their Facebook wall- just say it. You may be surprised how it will improve your marriage.
11. Make your spouse feel wanted
The last and most important tip to improve you marriage. You want to feel wanted and does you husband or wife. Just like all the above tips, this is also an everyday task. Show your feelings to your partner without any fear or regret. Touches, hugs and erotic games are some some things to help you on this!