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A kiss can be one of the most magical firsts in a relationship. It can also be the last moment of a relationship, terrible kissing can kill attraction fast! A great kiss is, well great! We all want that moment when we kiss someone and feel butterflies and the spark and attraction just takes over.
We want a kiss that leaves us wanting more. Whether you are a terrible kisser, a good kisser, or a great kisser you can always get better.
How to improve your kissing skills
1. Start off slow
If you are working you way to your first kiss with someone new this is especially true. If you take it slow you can take note of your partner’s kissing style and mimic them and their moves. An aggressive passionate kiss can be great, but start slow and build to hot and heavy.
2. Kiss how they kiss
If we like something we tend to incorporate it into our own style. The best way to figure out what your partner likes in kiss (if you don’t want to ask) is to notice how they kiss. Odds are most of their signature kissing moves are something they enjoy themselves.
3. No teeth, unless it’s a tiny nibble
Do not use your teeth. One of the worst kissing moments is when someone comes in to kiss you and their teeth are there and they knock against your teeth. Now, a little nibble on your partner’s lips is great. The best thing to do there is start out with a tiny nibble and gauge their reaction. If they love it do it again, if they don’t react, maybe shelve the nibbling. But, aside from nibbles, teeth are not part of kissing.
4. Pause for air
Break apart for a moment to take a breath, whisper something sweet or something sexy or just stare at your partner. Just make sure you are both taking a moment to breath. When you pause you let the tension build, and you get air. Air is important, so come up for air.
5. Swapping spit is gross
We have all had that kiss that was way too wet for comfort. No one wants to break away for air and have spit all over them or hanging off their lip. Seriously, if you have never experienced this, count yourself lucky. Sure kissing is wet, but try not to drool like a Basset Hound. And, by try I mean do not, period.
6. Tilt your head
When you go in for a kiss tilt your head a little to the left or right. When you go in straight forward you’re either going to get a quick peck, or your going to bump heads. A great way to come up for air (and to swallow that excess spit) is to pull back after a kiss and slowly tilt your head the other way.
Don’t switch positions too often, it can break up the moment, and leave your partner wondering what you are doing, but every so often if you tilt to the other side it can keep things interesting.
7. A little bit of tongue
A little tongue goes a long way. When you are kissing someone more deeply and tongues get involved, don’t stick your whole tongue in their mouth. No one wants you to examine their molars with your tongue. Just use a little of your tongue, and be gentle and almost tickle with it.
8. Gently suck on their lip
This move is a great move. Gently suck in their lip for just a second. It’s also a great move to use right before you break for air or to stare into their eyes. For some people this is their signature move, there is a reason, it is a good move. Just be careful to not overdo it and leave your partner slobbery.
9. Pay attention to your partner
Though I have mentioned this before it is important you pay attention to your kissing partner. You should be paying attention to what they are doing, so you can incorporate it into your kissing game.
You should also be paying attention to your partner so you can make note of what they like and what they don’t. Listen to their breathing, and the sounds they make. If they pull away, or seem to get less interested odds are they don’t like what you are doing.
10. Use your hands!
While you are kissing your hands can be a number of places. They should not be hanging at your sides. Play with their hair, put a hand on their cheek, clasp or rub their neck. Just do something with your hands. A passionate kiss involves way more than your lips!
11. Not too hard, not too soft
When you kiss you need to make sure you are using the right amount of pressure. Don’t kiss so lightly they can’t feel you kissing them (although you can throw a kiss in like this now and again to tease).
Don’t kiss too hard either, it can come off as aggressive or just all around unpleasant. Kissing is a lot like shaking hands, you don’t want a limp hand shake or one that is too firm.
12. Don’t think
Don’t over think it. If you are stressing about ow you are kissing and judging yourself you are taking yourself out of the moment. Don’t. Relax and go with the flow.
Don’t let your mind wander either. You should not be doing the grocery list while you are kissing someone. Just be there in the moment and go with the flow
Relax, you got this…
Quick check, your breath smells good and you are in the moment. Great! From there just trust your instincts and relax. Kiss how you like to be kissed, when someone kisses you and their “move” makes you go wow, incorporate it into your moves.
When you are kissing someone pay attention to what seems to excite them. It is a lot easier to kiss well than it is to kiss badly. Just relax and go with the flow, you will find your kiss techniques just start to happen. You got this, even if you don’t think you do, confidence and calm will go a long way.